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Dear Denny

Thank you so much for the blocking wires! They made it safely to the USA quite some time ago, but actually getting them into my hands was a little more involved. One day I went to my mailbox and among other things, there was a note saying “Sorry we missed you,” and stating that delivery had been attempted for a parcel requiring signature confirmation. The parcel’s sender, it stated, was CANADA.

“Guess I didn’t hear the doorbell,” I mused, and took the slip with me to the post office the following day. Alas, though, the parcel was not there. Me and my friends down at the post office concluded the carrier must have it out on his rounds just in case. But that afternoon at my mailbox, no parcel. What, I wondered, could CANADA be sending me?

In the days which followed, I faced anticipation, and dread at moments — what if, for instance, CANADA were rejecting everything I’ve sent there recently? I’ve been hearing from folks up that way who haven’t gotten stuff and it’s been forever. And earlier, Ted’s package was returned, and then I reshipped it priority and it took another month still. Perhaps CANADA is just sending me a nastygram saying “Keep your fibers, damn you!”

I checked again a few days later — perhaps my package was there waiting now. But again, no go. Oh, there were some exciting postal finds; I had stuff returned to me, in fact, in the form not of a delivery to my house but of a SORRY WE MISSED YOU, yet again. Still, I note, while I was home and available all day. Still no package. The Canadian mystery deepened. A week or so passed, and then another pinkish-orange slip, stating this was the second attempt to deliver, and the carrier was sorry he missed me, and my parcel would be available at the post office after 9 AM the following morning, or would be returned to CANADA in one week. So again, visiting the post office (and I’m getting to be quite good friends with some of the fine folks there), I asked about my shipment from CANADA, only to have it go unfound.

I called in that afternoon, after thinking about it, and requested that the package be redelivered, and the carrier explicitly told I’m home working all day, every day, and please make sure he rings the bell. Delivery was scheduled for the following day — the day when my second notice said CANADA would get its parcel back if I did not claim it.

It did not arrive. Neither did I get another pinkish-orange SORRY WE MISSED YOU.

Saddened, the following day, I drove to Dayton to see the periodontist. They’re used to me now — I’m the one with the yarn project in hand. And great news! Denny, you’ll be so happy for me: the implant is doing just fine, the permanent crown feels great, and there’s new bone growth. I don’t have to go back till June. Cheered by this, I thought I’d check the post office again. But to no avail. I sadly concluded that CANADA’s parcel must be headed back by now.

But then Friday rolled around — last Friday, the 7th, Pearl Harbor Day and all that — and there I was at the post office, express mailing the Pagoda shawl somewhere for a brief visit, pondering how much to insure it for, and the senior post office guy says “Weren’t you the one looking for that package? I think I know where it is.” And out he comes with this enormous tube in his hands. Sure enough, it’s from CANADA. Then I saw who it was from, realized what it must be, and remembered I was way overdue for a big nut shop.

It turns out I’m not alone in having expressed some frustration about my parcels of late. After further discussion and all, I remembered that the postal service is, in fact, a government organization… or is that an oxymoron? Anyway, it’s not only me who’s watched him drive up, then drive away, leaving a notice in the mailbox and not delivering the package; or… or various other things. I’m just not going to go getting all fired up about it because hey, a little apoplexy never solved anything really, did it? Okay then.

But back to the nuts, and the Great Canadian Nut Crisis, a situation so extreme it warrants the international shipment of esoteric knitting items and more. I should probably explain this for anybody who you haven’t already gotten ahold of in your mad quest for nuts.

You see, folks, some time ago I know I told you all that I had developed an addiction to Blue Diamond Wasabi-Soy Almonds. We’ve talked about them a few times. These:

Being addicted, I packed some to take to SOAR. You know, just in case. Well as it happens, things were so crazy at SOAR and everything was so busy, I didn’t even touch my emergency can of nuts. And Denny, you see, was my roommate. At the packing and parting of ways, she gave me some of that deadly strong coffee, ohhhh so sweet in its blackness, and what did I do? Callously, I gave her that can of nuts — as she prepared to get into a car with a slew of other Canadian yarn types and head for Toronto.

Where, apparently, these nuts cannot be found.

For those of you who’ve had them, you’ll understand. They’re quite addictive. Honestly, I expected they’d be awful, when I first tried them. Alas, it is not so.

So, anyway, Denny, waiting to come your way now are about a month’s supply of nuts, some lace yarn from SOAR fibers and my own personal secret stash, and a something to spin. I just have to get the box all packed up and see how my pals at the post office are today; I haven’t seen them since Friday and I’m sure they’re worrying about me by now.

Our weather here is madness, by the way. Last week, it snowed, and there were two days of school delay because of it. The roads had not been salted at all yet and one of those days they were even a little slick. The manchild got some sledding done and things looked very Christmasy. Today, though, it’s in the mid-60s Fahrenheit (that’s pushing 20C for the rest of the world) and the drizzle has stopped and the sun is out. But of course they say there’s some ice storm headed this way. I don’t know what to think.

I’ve been so slammed with things needing micromanagement that I’ve barely managed to do anything interesting in what seems like forever. Production, the post office, the holidays… well, I got the manchild’s annual hat done, and he’s put in his request for next year’s hat already. I’ll get him to stand still for a photo, and write up the recipe for the hat, sometime sooner or later. It’s a fun quick hat, and I’m doing a similar one for me now.

So let’s do some other general updates. First: Batt club folks, I understand a few of you have NOT received email updates so just in case: after all of the horrible shipping woes with October, November has been held and it and December ship at the end of this month, priority, with bonus fiber to thank you all for your patience.

Second: one reason I’ve had less to say lately is that a lot of the stuff I usually blog about, right now, I’m writing about in other ways. My first fiber article in print is due out late this month, and I’m extremely excited to see it, for real, actually in a magazine that I actually read and that you can actually buy in, like, real life. And there’s more of those coming! And I’ve been working on workshop materials; I’ve applied to be a mentor at SOAR next year (cross your fingers for me!) and whether I get lucky with that or not, I will be doing some teaching, and classes come with some documentation that students get to take home and keep.

Third: there are a few things going on also that remain confidential, but hopefully will soon be bringing lots of exciting news in their wake. So cross your fingers for me there too.

Fourth: it’s Christmas in two weeks, and we’re also in the several-month span in our family where there’s a birthday every 2 weeks. This, too, creates mayhem in my schedule. How much mayhem, you may be asking? Let me put it this way: I’m COMPLETELY out of beer. Yes, completely. There is no beer whatsoever in the whole entire house. This isn’t far off being as bad as running out of fiber or yarn. So with that said, Denny, I’m off to pack your box, ship it, and make the beer run. Maybe even in that order.